Another Momma's Remider

Last night was rough.

Not due to the sleeplessness of an infant or the toddler crying out for me. But due to my own pure emotional exhaustion.

I send an S.O.S. text to a best friend and in pure selfishness I hoped she would give up a few minutes of her sleep to feed me the encouraging words to so badly craved.

She called within a minute and I barely spit out a hello before the tears flowed.

I admitted to yelling at Rylee that day and how disgusting I felt for it. I wined about how exhausted I was to be a 24 hour milk machine and how I'm stuck wearing a nursing bra and pads otherwise I'll leak every where. I cried for wanting just a few moments to myself and how disheveled I was for losing my predictable schedule. I lost it when I noticed I still smelled of spit up after a 3 minute shower I took with a toddler at my feet.

And she said all the perfect things...

I know, that's rough...

Its just a phase...

Rylee won't remember...

Ugh its so exhausting...

You've got this!...

Sometimes another mommy's encouragement is so needed. We're all together in this journey as mommy's. There's no place for judgment or comparison. Only a place for understanding and encouragement. Sweet words on days that seem endless and sharing in happy first moments.

I am no perfect mother. There aren't enough IG filters to make my life perfect. And I don't want it to be. A little sanity would be nice, but not perfection.

As our call was ending, tears became laughter and my spirits were lifted. As I was rocking little J to sleep I thought of all the things I did accomplish. All the things I did right yesterday.

I loved on my two sweet littles.

I took two kids to the doctor and made it there on time

I treated myself to a Coke via chick-fil-a drive through and savored every last sip.

I made Rylee a wrap for her babies to "hold baby like mommy"

I sang "take me out to the ball game" 17 times to J

I completed two loads of laundry

Put a sleepy toddler to bed 15 mins early

And rocked a sweet boy to sleep

So in a day filled with pure chaos, a screaming baby, and a tantrum throwing toddler, I vow to end my day listing the "rights". Ignoring all that I didn't accomplish or what I failed at. Even through all the chaos, I love this life. There will be a day when I don't live in the same yoga pants for five days or smell of spit up. I will miss this. I will miss two littles needing me and their snuggles.

So here goes today, hoping to make it better then yesterday.

{And now my pitty party is over. Thanks for reading through the end}