To my brother and his young bride

Just over a month ago my brother became a husband. Not just any husband. Her husband. A husband to such a sweet gal who I truly feel blessed to now have as my sister-in-law. It makes me giddy I now have my own title for her and don't have to refer to her as "my brothers fiancé".

My husband and I are approaching our fifth wedding anniversary. I think about how fast five years has gone. I think about how much more we have to go. I'd like to be able to give my brother and his new bride the best of marriage advice and the best kept secret...but my words would fail. Because I don't know them. We are still learning how to keep the fire going as we grow together through the craziness that life throws our way.

This weekend we celebrate their one month anniversary with a lovely party with loved ones who weren't able to travel to the Key West wedding. During the chaotic planning period and fanatic phone calls from my mom (who is throwing this awesome party!) I wonder the words I would share with my brother. During their first fight. During their first joyful moment. During the moment he will hold his future child for the first time.

To my brother,

I'm thankful for being your older sister. You have always been a giving person, so thank you, for giving me another sister! Even during the moments you are quiet while I yell unfiltered words about something, I am thankful for our friendship. Life with you came full circle as we were painting pineapples for your reception. I watched you carefully pick the perfect pineapples and you reminded me to paint them perfectly for Shelby. We took that very seriously as we rushed them inside when it started pouring rain and left Jake outside as we saved the pineapples. Those few hours with you are some of my favorite to date. I felt like I was stealing the last few moments with you before you became a husband. I wish I would have had something more special to say other then drilling you, making sure you packed all what you would needed and commenting how wonderful the gold pineapples looked.

I would have told you how proud I was of you. Giving your heart to someone is no easy feat. But I have no doubt Shelby will hold tight to it.

I would have told you how special your wedding day will be. How the feeling of being in a bubble with just her will never cease your memory.

I would have told you to never let her go. Fight for her every day. Never break one of those special vows, yet always ask for forgiveness when life takes a hurtful turn.

I would have told you Shelby is just so perfect for you. She just really loves you. She really loves your family, your niece and nephew, and Disney World!

I would have told you no marriage is easy. You'll face challenges. You'll face doubt. You'll face change. And it's OK. Don't even stray from her, you'll need each other to make it through.

I would have told you this marriage will be your greatest adventure. As life give you joyous moments and one day beautiful children, never let it become greater then being her husband. Do your best to make her first. Every. Single. Day.

But if I would have told you all this, you would have thought I was crazy. You might have cried. I might have cried. And I trust that you will keep her heart safe.

If I would have told you all this, I would given away I'm really no expert. I've made mistakes in my marriage but I have never stopped loving my husband. And the biggest secret, he's never stopped loving me. They say love isn't always enough. I think it is.

Love is so much greater then you and I, sweet brother.

I hope your years of marriage are adventurous. Tread carefully through each new chapter and never forget why you fell in love with her.

I love you, your big sister
Leah

That's what she said

I can't be whiny enough about how much I miss being at home. I try not to. I feel very lucky for my year home with the kids. It's a year that felt like a blur, but I will never forget all the sweet little memories we built. I could go on forever about all the things I wish I should have done over that year (I do really regret not blogging on a weekly basis). Besides the time home with my little ones, I'd be a fat liar if I wasn't honest in saying I miss the extra time I had to get stuff done. Yes, I had two kids in tow, but it has become frustrating in managing my time. I either wait for Saturday to run errands, send my husband, or as soon as I get home rush back out the door. It's usually a mix of the three.

Yesterday I ran the kids to target to purchase Rylee a new bathrobe. I know, super exciting. The kids were pretty well behaved in the stroller till Jake woke from his random nap. He was not pleased and proceeded to let the entire store know he was not delighted in sitting in the stroller.

I rushed to check out. I gave the young college kid running the register a heaping spoonful of birth control. Rylee was persistently asking for popcorn and Jake was really testing the durability of the glassware with his screams. I hand over coupons and they aren't working. He looks at me and I request a supervisor to override them, I know they work. (Going to save me $9!). The line behind me starts building from no one to 3 people and I start feeling anxious.

Just as I am about to cry alongside the kids, a young lady behind says "hey its ok. You need to know its ok. You're doing fine". I sure did. I needed to know this craziness I have going on wasn't ruining the peacefulness at target.

She told me she had a two year old at home and I blurted out I was jealous she was at target alone. We laughed. I said thank you. In that moment I needed her to let me know it was OK. I felt better knowing someone else wasn't judging my parenting skills or questioning why they weren't following my directions (they're kids. Duh)

I didn't realize how much I needed her to say those words to me. Thank you target mom for connecting with me. You saved tears. Thank you for reaching out to me and saying what I needed to hear.

As I walked away I turned to her and said "thank you and I did need to hear that". It's a beautiful thing when a stranger gives you what you need. I am really learning to take my people watching skills to a new level and make that first move to connect. We all can become lost in our own little world and miss the greatness in people around us.

Reach out today. Start connecting. I was surprised how much that sweet lady's comment made me feel better.

That's what she said.